movin' on

As regular readers know, I scour the news for information on issues that relate to the seniors in the local community. Problems, solutions and situations to which they will relate. On the other hand… Last month there was a story on one of the news services about a 61 year-old man in Italy who was reportedly misbehaving to the point that his mother, with whom he still lives, cut off his allowance and took away his house keys. When the police were called on to intervene he complained about the food and his meager allowance. Mom complained about the “boy’s” late hours and poor attitude.

In parts of Europe it has become quite the fashion for men to stay in the parents home until they marry in their thirties. I don’t know of too many parallel circumstances in the local population. I know of a few cases where an unmarried son might live with an aging parent to share expenses and enjoy the familiar routine but this is an exception in the U.S.
It was more normal in past generations for the youngest daughter to stay at home to care for the parents in the later years of their lives, and that sacrifice of independence was part of the culture that focused on the family as an ongoing organism. The family was a priority. Mainstream American culture has been more and more concerned with the focus on individual freedoms. The person, not the family is now the central value of the culture. This grew from the framing of the government to serve the people, rather than the people serving the government or crown, as in the old country.

As we grow more diverse, and the assumptions of our culture evolve, we may see an increase in farsighted planning from Asian ancestor/descendant focus, or authority/ responsibility role definition from Middle Eastern influences. Wherever we go from here, one thing seems certain. That Italian guy should’ve moved out a long time ago.